Tuesday, July 29, 2014

another crush

another crush on another super duper model, Cara Delevingne.
it's not that I just knew about her, I love her since.. well, I followed her on instagram?

anyways, so today I thought that I should post something and go back to the old browsing-style.com technique, and I kinda got nothing, except how I found incloud.style.com is quite fascinating.

so I browse my mind instead, is there anything fashion related I want see? I was thinking, a cover of American Vogue or some ad campaign. but then I have a better idea, why not post about something that I always want to see--meaning, I never get bored of--and that is the endless combination of fun and high fashion in the fierce face of Cara Delevingne.

 Cara Delevingne for Topshop taken from models.com

If everyone wants to be you, that's already enough--like, not having everyone wants to be with you is a problem can be solved along the way--and I'll sell whatever I have to be Cara. But you know what? I don't think anyone can be Cara. No one can even look like Cara, not to me, if she has a twin sister, I'll even deny that they look the same.

and yes I'm that obsessed.

Saturday, June 21, 2014

growing up

Today I have this thought,
if I was richer and smarter, maybe I can have a better future.

I know it sounds ungrateful, but it's a lot more than that.
No, I'm not wishing that I'll somehow be reborn in a rich family. I see "being rich" and "being smart" as something you earn and takes effort, and if I made that effort earlier, maybe I would be going with my plans instead of looking for a plan B or C.


Okay, first thing first, my heading, growing up.
I'm not going to talk about how fast time flies and bla bla bla. Instead, I'm gonna talk about the greatest invention devils have made, regrets.

The one thing I regret most right now, is how I'm still making plans at this moment, instead of doing it already. I'm now officially in my last year of school, and I should be excited, but all I can feel right now is how terrified I am. I think that I'm too much of a coward to take chances even though it might not affect anything significantly. But after thinking that I'm a coward, I start questioning, am I? I start getting the paranoia that I don't even know myself, that maybe all I think I am is just how my brain created myself, maybe I'm just thoughts and not an actual character. That way, how could  I plan my future?

Another question came in, am I overthinking? But then, is overthinking really that bad? Or is it just a concept someone made because they spoil themselves and don't want to get burdened?

What I do know is that all these thoughts are driving me crazy. Probably 90% of them is not even relevant anymore, considering that I'm too old now, too old to think, and I should start doing something. I don't even think it matters if that thing I do is something that I like or I don't, because just like what I've said, I'm too old to think, thinking only leads to too much thinking, which leads to paranoia, and the rest you can either figure out yourself or you can re-read the previous paragraphs.

I better thing to think about is how to not let this happen to anyone. So get good grades, get a degree, be rich, and do what you can to protect (your) children from regrets.

When I re-read this I imagine a 50 years old writing it.
Eeeww, I'm old.

lots of love

Friday, May 30, 2014


Some people imagine me as hippie, and I kinda do too. I'm a vegetarian, and a sucker for animals, earth, children care stuffs.
I'm also very absurd and kinda crazy haha.

Okay, enough about me. Here's some pictures I--unprofessionally--took of me. Actually, I took this picture because I'm trying to sell the flower crown I wore in the picture. I'm in a terrible personal "economic crisis" these days and I've been looking for--effective--ways to make money. It's sad on how I have to deal with such stuff in High School, isn't it? haha

taken with my phone (Lenovo p700i) with the HDR effect-thingy

 yay! close up preview of my flower crown (it's only IDR 25K, btw)
p.s. don't judge my look, I'm trying to sell a flower crown here :p

outer white blouse : Old Navy
maxi dress : Body and Soul
flower crown : handmade
Yes, I was barefoot.

Tuesday, December 31, 2013